Success Through Spite
Show them who the hell you are.
A lot of outsiders see groups of writers as cute little clubs where they talk about fantastical things all day and imagine wildly with ramblings, coffee, and stress.
These assumptions are correct.
However, there is an unspoken part of writing groups most people don’t have the pleasure to observe. I speak of course, of the competition these writers have with one another to succeed.
Welcome to the underbelly.
There is a darkness to writers that exist, and a good writer cannot exist without it. There are of course, children’s stories that are fun and exceptional work, but I’m talking about authors who want to write the savage darkness of the soul of man, and the grittiness of life, and the moldy underside of death. This darkness, if properly harnessed, can capture reader’s imaginations, and guide them to turn the pages until they close the back cover.
The best writers I know are deeply competitive, and I love it. It’s good for the writer’s growth, and it’s even better for readers. Writers aren’t going to get any better if they remain unchallenged. In fact, I see it as a sign of immaturity if a writer turns his head away from criticism. The criticism should force you to want to become more with your writing. Stop saying you wish you could write like so-and-so. Write like you, and write like the best version of you. The more you work, the more you’ll learn how to become a better version of yourself with whatever craft you choose, and that’s applicable to any art form. Here in the underbelly of writing groups is the truly human side of things where snobs and gate-keepers dwell, but do not be afraid. Here is where you’ll grow in character and skill.
Tap into your inner brute.
We’re taught of the taboo nature of relying on a primitive level of who we are, and to a greater societal extend that’s true. The truly civilized are able to speak and portray well-meaning thought that promotes the greater advancements of humankind.
Forget all of that for this.
There’s a demon in you that’s been scraping at the door to come out, and here is his place to live. Here is where you take that co-worker who sucks, or that lady who glared at you at the check-out, and that comment the middle-school bully said to you when you were just a vulnerable, scared kid. This is where you’ll let your blood boil, and in an outrage, burn the night away sitting at the keyboard typing with purpose and a strength of will to prove them all wrong.
That felt good, didn’t it?
All communities have that guy, and you want to keep him in your life. I’m not saying to buy him a beer, but to listen to his rhetoric. Watch how he carries himself, and how arrogant he is when he lords over you. Watch how high he holds his nose when he finds himself in the plebian company of you and other well-meaning people. This guy hasn’t had a hard day in his life, has he? He doesn’t see the late nights where you toss and turn in bed, begging for it to all stop. It doesn’t stop. It eats at you like a carnivorous plague, burning at your skin and at your mind until you leap out of bed to write the scene down. The only way to release yourself from this prison of madness is to show yourself, hell, show him how much better you can be.
Of course, that guy, doesn’t care. He only shows you that half-baked writing he showed you last week, and the week before, and how he managed to get invited to that thing you wanted to go to, or accomplish a goal you know if you were just given the same opportunity, you could get it just as well.
On the exterior, he sees a smiling chimp, and a punk who can’t handle himself in this world. We feel our skin crawl at the sight of him, but, you can’t help but feel yourself needing to prove yourself better than he. You grow a fondness for him. Not in the sense of adopting a puppy, but more in a pitiful way. Yes, his presence is a canker sore, but he drives you, doesn’t he? Who’s smug face do you see at night in all that tossing, and turning? His. Who’s terrible advice greets you when you write a scene? His. Who’s given you a glorious rivalry that has given you a nemesis to compete with? Him.
It’s Darwinism at its best. You’ve become accustomed with your environment because you’ve adapted. You are now a bed bug who’s grown tolerant of the pesticide. You have moved on past learning how to do what you do with passion, and have finally moved on to how to twist the knife.
Twist without mercy.
You want to know how to get this person? You really want to have an effect on them?
Make it look easy.
Seriously, do what you’ve been doing with the anger, the spite, the fury in what you have been doing to write the best and peak performance you can, and do it without complaining. A little secret writers have is that they all struggle with accomplishments. We are all at odds against other writers who are also trying to do well and leave a legacy behind. I’m asking you not to look at the odds. I’m asking you to see the task you have in front of you, and beat at it until your knuckles are bloody and do it without giving so much as hint of satisfaction for them. These people love to watch the struggle. It makes them feel strong when they think it just “comes” to them. In most cases, this person we’ve been talking about is worse at writing than you. This person is insecure, but that’s alright. Teach him a lesson by doing more, and working harder behind the scenes to show him what you can do when he notices. Do it all without complaining. From experience, he’ll shut that trap of his when he knows there’s a bigger fish in the room. Sure, he’s probably older than you, but you’re here to beat him with experience.
Those nights where he’s too tired to keep going? You’re writing. Those after work periods where he sits down and watches four hours of TV? You’re writing. Those long weekends he has to himself and just wants to play that new game that released? You’re writing. The next time you guys meet, he’ll see exactly what he should have done instead of brag to you about what he’s better at. During all of this, you will be polite, and you will be courteous, and you will not complain about why you can’t write because if you truly apply yourself, you’ll be better, and he’ll know it. This not only applies to group meets, or the occasional run-in, but this work you’ve put into your craft will apply on a much greater scale. This scale will be that of your books. All that writing you’ve done out of spite has flown by with the time, and now you have a full-blown novel ready to be published. Reviewers will call you underrated, and friends will call you “prophetic”. If you show the competition that you not only make it look easy, but refer to it as fun, they’ll resent you for it. They’ll hate you for what you’ve accomplished with your life, and the cycle will continue. If the haters pay attention, you’ll both grow as writers, and if you attack your writing with all the energy and effort you put into anything else you love, it will grow to love you back.
You’re Not Made of Glass.
You’ve been through worse, and you’ll get through this, too. This week, I suggest you find out that reason. That petty reason you want to succeed. Do you want to show your doubtful family you can accomplish something? Do you want something left behind after you’re gone? Do you hate yourself so much, you need to drive that hatred into a direction that gives you positive results? I don’t judge you for any of these reasons, and neither should you. It is absolutely possible to be a savage gentleman, and this doesn’t mean to go to the next writing group and start a fist fight like you’re Andrew Jackson fighting for his life at his inauguration, though, spiritually, and mentally, I want you to. Be the third monkey getting on Noah’s Ark. Be the survivor who fought all the odds tooth and nail to earn his spot. When you get to a position in your life where you feel like you’re at last confident in your abilities, you’ll thank me for this tip to drive yourself. This isn’t even an open claim to be competitive with a specific person, just something you keep to yourself. Others see what you do, and if you can show them what you’re capable of, they’ll never doubt you again. Show them your age doesn’t affect you. Show them they don’t bother you, and in fact, they drive you to do even better. Have the Michael Jordan approach for when they doubt you, and spur you into a rampage of success that will shut their mouth, and cause them to watch their tone. You prove them wrong. Show them.
You show them who the hell you are.